i’ve used a handful of different dating apps and website throughout my years as a young stallion. what’s one thing they all share in common? (besides their inability to tame my wild spirit?) they all have profiles full of “love to laugh”. good fucking god. not since “random adventures” has a simple phrase described so much monotony and lack of personality with so little.
oh shit, i had no idea you love to laugh, that totally puts your collection of “basic experience” stock photos into context. you went to the broad and took a picture under the giant chairs? get out, no way. you went to LACMA and posed in front of the streetlights? seriously, you crazy. top that off with the fact that you love to laugh and you are truly one in a million.
at least when i see that ridiculous, mentally unstable marilyn monroe quote on a profile, i know it’ll be a wild fuckin’ ride. “loves to laugh” girl over here crying that she spilled her pumpkin spice latte on her toms. that’s how i’m spending my friday night? yeah, no.
also, where do you all get off putting that aggressive “make me laugh” on your profile? unless i specifically am a comedian who gets paid to match with people on dating apps and tell them jokes, make your own dumbass self laugh. why are you posting a job listing on your dating profile? you probably think bee movie was the pinacle of jerry seinfeld’s career, shut up.
pete n' tony's internet adventure 